I've never told her....!!

I've never told her how her smile lifts me up...
She's not the LOL type. But sure she giggles at times and gets me into the tickle. She smiles, and in fact laughs so much, laughing hugging her stomach insanely. But you never hear it after those initial tones which pick up the laugh. There's a kid in her, laughing, trying not to make a sound. You can see her eyes go wet, all in joy! Her lips don't need a lip gloss. Since they already wear a smile. Cute she!

I've never told her how much I adore her eyes...
Her eyes, they're so beautiful. But no! That's not the apt word. It would take essays to explain. I hear waves crash over the rocks near the sea every time she gives a slow wink with her half-shut eyes. Imagine a rainbow over the sea, those are her eyebrows. They are natural, nothing more, nothing less. She looks into my eyes and I go blind, all in a flash. Her eyes, they glitter more than diamonds. She's happy, she smiles, and they glitter even more. She does get angry at times and her eyebrows try joining their ends. They make me worry. I place a kiss right between that gap so that they stay separated, for happiness' sake. She gives a worried look sometimes, looking down, her eyes trying not to meet mine. Only waiting for mine to lift hers up.

I've never told her how her voice drives me crazy...
She isn't a vocalist. But I would rather let her talk and do the listening any day over anything! It's adorable and shy, an effect of her shy nature, an effect of her innocence. I would frighten her just to see her voice wobble. The way she calls out my name in the cutest ever form on earth, makes me thank my parents for naming me that way, otherwise this cute angel of mine wouldn't be toying my name this way! More crazy do I go when she speaks half asleep in bed. I wish the sun never rose up again the next day just to hear her mutter those words. I don't care what she says though. Her unclear voice is all that matters to me.

I've never told her how sweet she is...
The way she hugs me from my behind when I return home with full of sweat, the way she makes me rest over her bosom and make me hear her heartbeats compose tunes for me, the way she pulls my cheek when I lie on her lap, the way she brushes her lips with those of mine, the way she grabs my hand tightly when she needs me the most, the way she cutely punches my stomach when I fool her, the way she winks at me when she achieves something... I declare that I lost to her, and indeed I'm lost, in her! Sweetness personified. My honey!

I've never told her what she means to me...
She means happiness. She means sweetness. She means seasons. She means paradise. She means love. She means friendship. She means mother. She also means a child. She means the most, and oh. that would be sacrilege. She means EVERYTHING. Get me a word beyond 'everything'. She would mean that to me.

I've never told her how much I love her...
You probably might think why I haven't told all these to her. Well, definitely I would love to. But the fact is that I haven't met her yet! I haven't moved with her yet. I haven't married her yet to express all my love for her. But when I do, she would probably say............. I better not expect too much! But still, I wish she says "You silly, I knew it even before you said!"

Changing Faces

Bottom of the rack did my albums lay,
Pulled them out and they made my day.
Posing together within transparent sheets,
Obsequiously got crowded those memories.

Nestled close in each others arms,
Unaware of our possessed charms.
Closed my eyes just to hear,
Those forgotten voices loud and clear.

Blurred memories came to the fore,
Took me back to the days of yore.
Tranquil moments as such stay memorable,
Fortunate to get away not into a rubble.

For the loved ones smiled as my fingers trace,
Innocence connoted on everyone's face.
Questions now arise why are they lost,
Desperate to bring them back at any cost.

They now stand with their faces changed,
Innocence put to the slaughter and buried.
Running after time and for themselves,
And none of us seem to be selfless.

From let us meet and plan,
To let us plan and meet.
Legs which once ran tireless for miles,
Now run just to see them bearing fake smiles.

I blame not everyone,
For they all were bygone.
But still their heart belongs to me,
Safe somewhere even they cant see.

I shall continue being their friend,
Never letting our friendship end.
Be with them forever and more,
Wishing some magic still left in store.

Mission Happiness...!

Staying away from Blogging for eight months should be the worst case for any emulous blogger. Not that I'm too much an aspiring one to add myself in that category in the first place. And the days were rather VERY MUCH eventful. Almost two-thirds of a year right?! Unable to recollect many, and there's also some sense of insecurity in me which stops me from publishing them. Still this page is being read by many be whatever crap I post, and I was even asked when am I gonna publish my next post by at least half a dozen people in the meantime. Thanks a ton for your interest and support! And I, myself was surprised to see when I accidentally slipped into my webpage that the page-hits had crossed over 2000! Readers have mostly been my School and College friends and Railfans who read stuffs apart from trains too.

Meanwhile, I just had my 6th semester done and awaiting the most disastrous result of my lifetime, though I'm little bit happy about the fact that I have just one more year to crib about Engineering. Screwed up two papers like never before and adding insult to injury the University did its part by setting up a controversial question paper which ended up in a fiasco. So its gonna be minimum three to watch out for this time. Never had I done a satisfying semester as yet and this worst episode comes at a time where placements are around the corner. Never mind, Anna University might spring up a surprise anytime even during the results. Keeping my fingers crossed.

Lots of plans in mind due this summer. At least to forget what I have been for the past 6 months. I get bitten by the blue every now and then, and the best way to not get caught unawares is to be prepared. One month of healthy distraction is all I need. I feel, I shouldn't be sulking when things aren't gonna change. And rightly the official announcement has come that my college reopens only on June 24th. 40 whole days!!! Thanks for being so generous. I need a break, and this is what I've planned to do, or keep myself engaged so that I don't let myself down again...

And here are things I wish to do this summer....

1. Hanging out - This is something which I had missed so much in the recent past. Staying home is the best way to make things worse when you are not at the best of yourself. Interactions and going out with more happy and fun loving people is the need of the hour. Meeting or catching up with old friends and spending quality time with them is always worth it. Meanwhile, my conversations with Mom have come down considerably. Not that she's boring and all, but only that she's the most bugging person ever in my life. lol! I'll come back to you after the semester results, Mom. Or at least after a month's holidays. Stay away Mom, just leave me alone.

2. Cut off unwanted people - This just adds as an epilogue to my previous point. But since it involved my Mom, I had no heart to include her in this 'unwanted' category. Justice done. There are people who don't even dream of making me feel good. Its not their job anyway. But at least they could have been a little bit nicer. They always cling around, off course with jealousy, and with no other job other than intimidating, rude remarking, humiliating, gossiping the wrong and what not?! It is indeed because of these people I was able to segregate whom I need and whom I don't. There's always a good from the bad. Thank you so much! Go fetch a life.

3. Railfanning - How would I miss out this one? My holidays are incomplete without Railfanning. Locomotives and trains have never disappointed in entertaining me at any point in life. They are such sweet lifeless buddies who make me feel light which even human beings around couldn't.

4. Blogging - Keying this out in the blogosphere, it would be injustice if I don't mention Blogging. I have always amazed at people who spend so much time and interest on blogging. From where do they get so much topics to write? I wonder. I wish I read and write more this summer. And this is just the perfect headstart.

5. CAT / Placement preparation - Though both require the same kind of preparation on the basics, I'm almost unsure about the placement part since the results are unfortunately bound to be a flop show. Its too early to say. But its almost certain. Unless the University is open handed in awarding marks, there seems to be no other magical way to clear those papers. Better not to expect that since the correction standards have gone haywire since last semester. Never mind, its all over.And CAT? Yes, the hunt is still there. Atleast in securing a good college if not for the IIMs.

6. Physical exercise / Weight reduction - This has been on high agenda. I somewhat have started getting a feeling that I'm getting obese without physical exercise these days. Not even Cricket. Quite a number of people around me have started gym-ming and keep discussing about being muscular, diet-control etc., I have no interest in that though. Just wanna keep myself fit and healthy. Had a 45 minute fast-walk today morning against the beaming sun and felt the calories burning away. Loved it. Planning to involve myself in exercising and jogging too.

7. Inplant training - Holidays, and yes, time for inplant training. Will never forget the previous year's 8-day training at Basin Bridge Railway Yard where there was maximum fun and learning. Awaiting one such training this year too, and it shall prove to be relaxing for sure.

8. Movies / Novels - My bad habit that I realize these things do exist, only during summer! Planning to catch up those missed ones during leisure.

9. Pray - That doesn't need any explanation.

Stay Blessed! Wish you a Happy Summer ahead! :)

Tagged !!!

I got tagged too, so I decide to write few things about me. (Err... Just one another lame excuse for not being able to "think" much to write during the holidays!)

So here we go...

Ten things I wish I could say to the people whom I love...

1. I've always cared for you nevertheless of whatever I do.
2. Without you, life wouldn't have been so interesting.
3. You are the best thing I can ever get.
4. I miss you a lot. More than I can ever express.
5. I wish I knew you better.
6. I wish you reciprocate something back, of what I give you.
7. I completely understand whenever you say you are busy. I just pretend otherwise.
8. Please don't ignore me. Losing you is my biggest fear.
9. You made me feel special. Thank you!
10. Love you lots!!! Though I never say it out.



Nine things about myself...

1. I have a good heart as you know it well. And I can boast about it till I fall.
2. Trains are in my blood. Anyone here?
3. I’m an absolute absent minded freak.
4. I hate to show attitude on my loved ones. I'm kind enough to forgive people.
5. "Thanks" and "Sorry" are the words which I use the most. They don't cost a penny.
6. Daydreaming??? Oh yeah!!!
7. I save money. That doesn't mean I'm stingy.
8. I don't trust anyone easily. But you can trust me. Infact most of them does.
9. I hate to say "Goodbye". Well what's the "Good" in it?



Eight ways to win my heart...

1. Be modest and honest. Tell me the truth, even if it hurts.
2. When you are with me, try to be with me.
3. I hate being ignored, I say this a thousand times and that's what the above one means too.
4. Make me laugh and laugh with me. I'm sure I can make you happy.
5. Have deep conversations with me. You can very well share your secrets.
6. Let me be a part of both your happiness and sorrow.
7. Don't boast too much about yourself before me. I'll be laughing inside.
8. And most importantly, your looks never ever matter to me.



Seven things that cross my mind a lot...

1. Future?!!
2. What power are my favorite trains gonna get today?
3. Let me put up a chat with him/her now.
4. Yeah, my parents are watching me... Sniff!
5. Why am I being ignored by a few?!
6. Is this life really worth living it?
7. How am I gonna fare this semester?! Just for the heck of it.



Six things I wish I never did...

1. I shouldn't have taken up Engineering... Sick!!!
2. I shouldn't have met few, till now and forever.
3. I shouldn't have allowed those few to boss over me.
4. I shouldn't have experimented much with myself.
5. I shouldn't have trusted few too much.
6. I shouldn't be regretting like this now!!!




Five turn off's...

1. Ignorance.
2. Advise... Goddamn I can organise myself more than what you think!
3. Bossing over me.
4. Lack of freedom.
5. Curd... Yuck!!!





Four turn on's...

1. Making friendship... I'm ready!
2. You like me? I don't need anything else...
3. Are you happy? I would always love to see it!
4. Rail-fanning... Yes sir!







Three things I want to do before I die...

1. Make my Parents, Buddies and my Partner feel that they wouldn't have got a better one than me.
2. Charity from the money I earn.
3. Die before my loved ones die...





Two smileys that describe me...

;-)
:-O







One confession...

I shall never change myself for anyone... Because I'm already being liked for what I am. (I think and hope so.....!!!)






CHEERS TO LIFE !!! :)

I Do Scribble Some Poetry....!!!

We started together somewhere someday
Taking a path supposed to be the destiny's way,
Some ditched me and held me at bay
While most called it a league and had just raced away,

I know I'm heading nowhere
Searching for people who would really care,
I never knew anything before
That I'll live this moment just to allure,

As I tread along the path of life
Future shows me the signs of strife,
The past was as green as the meadows
I look for a place to rest under the shadows,

I don't wanna move further
I can't stay here either,
Future looks bleak till the horizon
While even the next second in life remains unknown,

I look around for people
Who are no more visible,
They've raced ahead of me so wild
Perhaps they were destiny's child?!

I stand still, taking a turn
Looking the way I had come,
This path was well known to me
I go back once again absolutely care-free,

Unable to stand now
Having come a long way in this path,
With nobody here to accompany me
I sit in a bench beneath a withering tree,

Memories have been the only thing which I carry
While others are working towards their glory,
As I nestle myself in this bench
I'm lost among a sea of memories,

I knew this wasn't gonna help me anyway
Yet you can't keep running life in an expressway,
Pauses are needed when going gets tough
Cause even the heart takes it after every beat,

As a cool breeze freshens me up
I find dry leaves shedding down from the top,
As I catch one of them and grasp it tight
It crumbles just like those memories before my sight,

I'm moved
Not towards my destiny yet,
But within my heart
That I'm unable to cement those crumbling ones intact,

I haven't taken the wrong turn
I'm just lagging behind waiting for someone,
Not to hold my hands and to lead me ahead
Just to sit beside me to give a heed,

I hate this feeling of being left behind
Not knowing how to express it out,
I look back at the past and dream about the future
Heading to a world of my own!

The Reason Why?!!!

Now what's there in a train and why are you so crazy about it??? This one question which people around me have been asking me for the whole of my life so far! Well to all those people out there, here is my answer.... Its my life! No doubt about that. Not that I wanted to be different from others... but this passion of mine made me different! To be true, Railways occupy a significant position very close to my heart! Trains are ones which I love more than myself. No exaggeration here! Right from my childhood I grew up watching trains rather than cartoons.(My residence is located very close to the railway lines along the Chennai-Bangalore route) I can still remember my younger days when I used to have a notebook in which I used to jot down all the names of the trains zooming past my home with the time of crossing, sitting right from my balcony. That was all the rail-fanning I was able to do as an 8 year old kid! There were also days when my cousin used to accompany me.... He is not an ardent railfan though! I started drawing sketches of trains and did the same to win some drawing competitons too. Gosh! Were they so realistic or what??? Well I can pat myself that I'm quite good in drawing trains if not other stuff! Couple of years later when the mighty WAPs came into operation I was quite able to guess with its looks and charisma that they were dedicated entirely to passenger service just because I felt like that! Those days I used to distinguish WAPs, WAMs and their mighty counterparts WAGs as "express engines" and "goods engines" respectively. Hehe! There wasn't anyone to provide me proper information on what these mean machines were meant for actually.(After all I was a 10 year old kid then!) The "Time Table" (southern railways) remained the book which I gave the highest priority ever. Later when my dad accidentally encountered the "Trains at a glance" which is a larger version of all the zonal railway time tables covering all the routes and the trains across the country, I guessed i ve got the much needed treasure which I deserved a lot. Accidentally though! My dad is one guy who encourages me a lot in rail-fanning (He doesn't ask stupid questions like what others do. hehe!) and my uncle (who is a frequent traveler by the SCR) who shares his views about the Railways and his personal experiences and there's also a friend of mine who joins me during rail-fanning action! nice to see that atleast there are few people around me who have similar interests of mine :) Years later I was able to learn almost anything and everything about the great Indian Railways through the IRFCA website! and thanks a ton to all those people in Orkut who helped me in gaining more interesting information and stuff about railways throughout the country! Hope this journey never ends!

Are Relationships For A Reason?

The journey of life gives us many chances of meeting different people everyday. We like some, loath many and there a very few who touch us in a way that life without them is impossible! It appears as if they have come to assist us through a difficulty, to provide us with guidance and support us emotionally and they are! We never realize that what has come must leave as well. But we never do so hoping that the present will last forever. Do people really come into our lives with a reason? Well some may oppose while many may agree with this. Thats one thing which happens very easily in one's life. We meet many people who come into our life for a reason and when their job gets over they make a move. With no wrong in our part or at an inconvenient time this person does something to bring the relationship to an end! Our temporary desire has been fulfilled and their job gets done. Things indeed gotta go on! But this part-time relationship brings us an unbelievable amount of joy. They make us laugh, teach you something which you would have never seen or heard before. When you begin to believe that the person is getting quite close to you and when you try to get more closer, the relationship turns to show up its other face.... There is so much pain in it and you gotta believe it! Whereas lifetime relationships teach us healthy lessons and the relationships do have a solid emotional foundation. Accept and love the person to have a better understanding. Give whatever you have so that you don't lose him/her. But the question that still remains unanswered is that - "Can we really figure out who is with us for what...???" Life alone has the answer for it!